Mardi Gras: or Ron discovers Plastic Trinkets
by Stella7
Summary: DG- something i stumbled across and wrote a long time ago- not very plotish and very silly but had to put under humor as there is no silly genre
1. Default Chapter

Mardi Gras: or Ron Discovers Plastic Trinkets  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to J.K. Rowling or the cities of New Orleans or Destrehan or the parish of ST. Charles. H.T. is mine- MUAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHA and you can not have her!!!! Muahahahahahaha cough   
  
Little ol' Ginny was walking down the hallway trying not to be noticed. However her new grown-uppyness had not escaped Draco Malfoy's eyes (which were not beady or necessarily evil).  
  
However Draco was not anywhere near Ginny at the moment; so the reason as to why the author brought him up even escapes her.  
  
Anyway, she walked into a classroom and discovered that now Draco was now in the near vicinity as her as was Ron, Hermione and Harry. The fact that they were not fighting did not bother any of them. (Strangely)  
  
"Does anyone know about parish hopping?" Harry was asking. (This author seriously wonders if England still has parishes like in the 18th century Jane Austin times or if they have....shires or something. If not deal.)  
  
"It allows you to go from parish to parish in England without necessarily apparating," Ginny spoke up behind them. The older teens turned to her.  
  
"Thanks Ginny. Now go away," Ron said rudely because he was near his love (No not Draco you silly people! Or Harry!- Hermione, gooses).  
  
Ginny mouthed off silently behind their backs and walked a bit loudly, shut the door and quietly walked back. Draco noticed this but hid his smile. (This author is not going to do a lot of the: No I can't like her I'm evil/a Malfoy/a snickerdoodle.)  
  
"What are we attempting to do?" Draco asked casually. He looked into their eyes. The number one rule of lying or not giving things away: well that's not to tell complete lies. But the second is to never look up- its like you don't know (guessing), never look down- they think your lying, and never look at the thing (like Ginny) behind them so they wont be tempted to turn around.  
  
"We want to visit someone," Hermione said offhandedly. (Snuffles)  
  
"Er...ok."  
  
"Well to do the spell we have to say this together": So holding the book up they started to read-  
  
"Hold on, we don't know where Snuffles is," Hermione interjected.  
  
"These correspond with the different parishes."  
"Wait, we're going to visit a guy named Snuffles?" Draco asked laughing. Draco and the author had really no idea as to why he was here or why the dream team just didn't get someone out of their house to help them but they aren't that smart are they (the dream team)?  
  
"Shut it- we need at least 4 people for the spell," Harry said.  
  
"Oh didn't Snuffles say a Charles something or other?" Ron asked. He had though reeeaaallllyyy hard to come up with that.  
  
"That's it! Yes! Here it is!" Hermione said flipping through the book. So they said together the really crappy rhyme that author of the book who wrote the spell was shot over:  
  
'Round and Round,  
Up and down,  
To St. Charles,  
We are bound."  
  
Suddenly they ZAP-ED out of existence (just kidding), they ZAP-ED out of the room and LEFT THE BOOK!!!  
  
They landed with a thud. Ginny looked at whose arm she was attached to. Draco stared back at her. Releasing quickly she edged away.  
  
"Ginny what are you doing here!?" Ron screeched.  
  
"Err... going along for the ride?" Ginny guessed. (Draco laughed)  
  
"Ah you're here. I've been waiting," came a voice behind them. They turned to see:  
  
!Voldemort! (Just kidding)  
  
They turned to see: a girl (A little disappointing I know...)  
  
"Who are you?" asked Hermione.  
  
"I'm Celeste but you can call me H.T.," said the girl.  
  
"That didn't make sense." Draco muttered.  
  
"No it doesn't, but neither does this story." Said H.T. turning to him.  
  
"Where are we?" asked Harry.  
  
"You're in Destrehan."  
  
Psycho music: Reeekeekeeekeeekeek! (just kidding)  
  
"Where?" Ginny asked.  
  
"St, Charles Parish," answered H.T.  
  
"Oh, and what part of England is this?" asked Ron.  
  
H.T. raised an eyebrow. "Ya'll aren't in England. This is Louisiana." (Ok, not time to cue the Psycho music- we are not redneck and don't eat alligators!)  
  
"AHH! Don't hurt us!" Ron yelled.  
  
Everyone turned and stared.  
  
"Whyyyy?" asked Draco.  
  
"Louisiana is probably some secret code name for You-Know-Who's secret lair!"  
  
"You mean...!Voldemort! Draco asked cackling.  
  
"EEK!" Ron cried.  
  
"Oh enough!" Hermione yelled. Turning to H.T. she said, "Please don't tell me we're where a think we are..."  
  
"Where?" Harry asked.  
  
"America," supplied H.T.  
  
"Cool!" burst out Ginny. Everyone turned to her. "I mean...Oh No!"  
  
"How could we be in Louisiana?" mused Hermione.  
  
"Oh I see," H.T. realized. "You did a parish hopping. I was waiting for you because the Bureau of Magic has this place marked off as a drop off point."  
  
"Yeah what is this place?" Draco looked about.  
  
H.T. led them out of the cover of the oak trees. In front of them was a huge house. "Ya'll are at Destrehan Plantation," she said.  
  
"You sick people! You still own slaves!!" yelled Ron.  
  
"Er...no. It a museum."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Anyway, lots of people in England get sent here to Louisiana by mistake because we have parishes too. Just look up the real parish you want in your book and-." She was cut off by Hermione.  
  
"Crap!" she searched her pockets. "I left it at school!"  
  
"Wonderful," Draco and Ginny both muttered.  
  
"Do you know any spell to get us back?" asked Harry.  
  
"No. The only book with them in it, here, is in my school. However the place is being fumigated the muggle way because the spell was big enough for the school. It should be done on Monday though."  
  
"That's in three days," moaned Ginny.  
  
"Well in the meantime I suggest we go somewhere. Unfortunately you can't use your wands around here as it's to highly concentrated magic wise. Any attempts by a foreign wand and the enforcement Aurors will be down on us like a fish on butter."  
  
"That didn't make sense either." Draco said. "So where can we stay?"  
  
"I suggest we get two rooms at the Iberville suits. It's owned by wizards so we won't be bothered."  
  
They walked past the huge house and towards the equally huge levee across the busy muggle road. When they were walking Ginny looked up into a window in the second story. There she saw a woman in antebellum period clothing and on the gallery a man and woman watching the young wizards.  
  
After they had hiked up the 'damned hill'(Draco) 'It's not a hill, it's a levee'(H.T.) Levee, they looked over to see a boat. They climbed in and the boat (invisible and going quite fast with H.T. at the wheel) went down the river. They dodged barges (Ron: "AHHHH!!!!") and soon arrived at New Orleans. (Party capital of the world)  
  
"Where are we?" Asked Ron.  
"We're in New Orleans, Party capital of the world." Answered H.T.  
  
"EEK!" Ron eeked. "Don't vampires live here?"  
  
"Yes but its too close to dawn for them to be out now. We were in the most danger, back at the plantation." With Ron glancing around every so often the group took a streetcar to the hotel.  
  
"Ya'll are lucky ya'll came just in time for Mardi Gras!" H.T. exclaimed prompting poor Ron to faint.  
  
Please note that this story is probably not very good/ may kill brain cells/ not very thought out/ righto.  
  
Please feel free to flame all you like- the voices in my head are not listening to you sticks out tounge 


	2. Chapter 2

Mardi Gras: or Ron Discovers Plastic Trinkets  
  
Chapter 2  
  
From last time:  
  
"Ya'll are lucky ya'll came just in time for Mardi Gras!" H.T. exclaimed prompting poor Ron to faint.  
  
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Everyone turned to Ron.  
  
"He's fainted..." Harry stated as they stared at the red-head's body lying in the middle of the street. (A person in the middle of the street is no big deal so close to Mardi Gras and the hordes of drunken types a few streets over...)  
  
"Thank you captain obvious," Ginny muttered.  
  
At that moment Ron groaned and sat up, smelling like beer, fags (cigarettes you silly things), and dirt.  
  
H.T. helped him up, saying, "At least you didn't fall in the street, those taxis don't stop for just anyone."  
  
The walked into the gilded, fancy-shmancy lower lobby of the Iberville hotel.  
  
"Ok," H.T. looked at the Hogwarts students. "Act natural and follow my lead. Don't say anything about being here accidentally because ya'll dum- dums don't have passports." (Yes even wizards need passports to get in the U.S.)  
  
H.T. turned to one of the elevators and pressed the up button. The doors opened and they walked into the mirrored elevator.  
  
"Ron, c'mon." Hermione said seeing the dirty boy still outside the deathtrap- I mean- elevator.  
  
Ron shook his head and backed a bit up. "I don't trust those Muggle deathtraps!"  
  
"Oh please," Harry groaned and held the door open. "You won't die-."  
  
But he was interrupted by Ginny pushing past him. "No, Harry. Let me."  
  
Ginny grabbed Ron, pushing him towards the gaping hole-err- elevator entrance, struggling to get her brother onto the elevator.  
  
"Noooooo!!!" Ron cried and put his feet and hands on the frame, preventing Ginny from making progress.  
  
At that moment a huge, flying lizard flew towards Ron who screamed like a little girl.  
  
[Kidding]  
  
At that moment a Draco thing popped out from the elevator and pulled the struggling Ron back with him. As soon as Ginny cleared the doorway Harry pulled his foot from blocking the sliding door.  
  
"ARRRGGGG!!!!!!" Ron pounded on the door. "We'll all fall to our death!"  
  
Silence. The only sound was the elevator music playing cheese-y Mardi Gras music.  
  
"We're still on the first floor," Hermione stared at him. She reached over and pushed the Lobby button, sending the elevator up.  
  
Ron started shaking and jabbering. "Is he always like this?" H.T. and Draco asked at the same time.  
  
"Only in different countries. Egypt was the worst," Ginny said as the doors opened to reveal the lobby.  
  
"Hey, Ron. We're here." H.T. nudged the form on the floor.  
  
"...eeeble eeeeble-what?" Ron WAS MIRACULOUSLY HEALED!! Standing up he cried, "I CAN WALK AGAIN!! I AM HEALED!!"  
  
"Right, Weasley, just walk," Draco shoved the raving boy from the elevator and into the vast lobby.  
  
The group got two rooms and for some reason due to the insanity and lack of reasonable plot in the story Ginny, Draco and H.T. were in one room.  
  
These parting words will end the second chapter:  
  
Ron looked around the room, "At least we left the ducks at home."  
  
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A/N: Thank you takes a bow review and feel free to flame all you want!  
  
Next up: Camillio Grill (was that right? sorry I can't spell), and they loose Ron! 


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